Slacking with Reason

So I sit.. I wait.. I think.

I have no idea which way is up anymore. I walk over to the window, look outside at the hazed over stars, turn back around, and sit. And wait. And think.

A break? Are you serious? For real?

Some time to prepare, yes, much needed prep time. Prepping my week-long journey of sleepless nights, senseless tossing and turning, and sorrow laden structure. I need a breather.

Withdrawn, misconstrued, and otherwise just plain lost.

My mind is all over the place.

Sitting In Her Nowhere Land

So I guess with the blogging returns the bitching. But with the week I've had, I really think that I deserve it.

The world is not at my command.
Not today anyhow.

I've been without my vehicle, my precious decepticar, for almost a week now. The gas line is frozen and it has not been nearly warm enough to get the beast roaring again.

I'm so broke it's not even funny, and if my car troubles turn out to not be gas line issues then I am going to remain just as broke with car maintenance costs.

My step mom's uncle just died. I feel for her, really. The man was a cool motherfucker, so much pep. However, not to sound insensitive, with the whole family leaving tomorrow for the funeral I have no parental units to rely on for transportation for the duration of the weekend. I can't afford to miss any work. It really seems like every time I have car issues they are out of town.

My aunt is dying. She's in total denial about it, hasn't told anyone... not even her own daughters. With every shell of information that comes up about the issue more tears are shed simply for our lack of the knowledge of the severity and the lack of knowledge that we all have about her condition. We know she has cancer that started in her lungs and has progressed through her entire body... however we have no time frame for her remaining time, we have no information regarding whether or not she will become incapacitated, and the whole thing is a messy, teary wreck. She needs to start making decisions before she loses the ability to.

And on top of it all... the day is Valentine's Day... my least favorite day of the year. Not because I am single because that's far from the truth, but because I think it is the most ridiculous excuse to do something nice for somebody. Do it any other fucking day of the year.

I have a feeling I'm going to need a shoulder really, really soon here.

J With My Foot Up His Ass

My boyfriend sucks.

Go to 'J On Your Face'

Be sure to let him know how awful he is.

Thanks <3

The Return

Since I quit tending to my myspace account, my passion for blogging has long subsided. However, with the discovery of this neat little site my urge has been reignited.

I'm pissed off.

Right now I am working on a persuasive speech about violence in the media (all sorts, not just video games) and it bothers me to think about how many people ignore the facts about studies around this issue.

1) The media we take in is purely choice. If you don't want to watch gun slinging badasses on fox, the turn on the fucking discovery channel.

2) Studies show that violent media stimulates an organ in the brain called the amygdala, an organ in the lymbic system that controls fighting, feeding, fleeing, and fucking. How about we pay attention to the other triggers the amygdala controls other then fighting.

3) Parental units need to stop blaming society's problems on the media and start pointing the finger at themselves.

4) If you don't want your kid getting a hold of violent video games, don't shell out 60 dollars to purchase them Manhunt 2 or Grand Theft Auto. Parents can act as a filter in deciding what's appropriate and what truly isn't.

I hope that my presentation can come off as sharp tongued as this.

Anyway, look for more rants to come. For now, I must away.