Facelift Via Alcohol

So she hit a rought spot a bit ago, she also apologizes for the lack of writing in the blog space or otherwise. She meant to write you, she really did.

She's working things out in her head right now. Stability is re-entering her life. She hit the brakes on things flourishing in reverse.

She drank last Thursday, and she hates to say this but it made many of the aspects of her life better. She is more relaxed, more self aware, more confident, and most importantly more secure. Her and her man have an understanding now. They're working things out, and that's okay.

She's also doing well in school, work, and all of the other aspects of her life. She's just ready to call it quits with retail. Unlike her love life, she and retail are just about splitsville. At least she wants to be. But they've been together such a long time, it would be hard. No. That's a lie. Think of a husband beating the shit out of you for years on end then you finally have the balls to stand up to him. That's how her and retail will end. A bright flash of sarcastic brilliance and an epic exit that all will remember.

She will burst through those doors, two week notice in hand, hand it off and be elated for the fact that she knows there will only be two more weeks left of this hell, this nightmare, this cash droor, and register.

So this is the part where she wanted me to say goodnight and good luck, but I'll leave that to Ed Murrow.

Let me re-word this for her:

Peace. Sleep well. Dream about your loved ones. And enjoy your cereal in the morning.

Over and out.

Provided I Haven't Completely Lost Yet.....

So things are beginning to look up. Both of my jobs are giving me somewhat desirable amounts of hours, however working double shifts equaling out to thirteen hour days or more is starting to wear me thin. It's all good though, because a new job prospect has come up and it looks somewhat promising.

I had to recently bite the credit card bullet, however this entails some good things as well. I will be able to get my car fixed and working to its full potential without completely breaking my bank, I will be able to build some credit so getting student loans will be easier in the long run, and it will give me a lesson or two in managing money. It's a promising little endeavor. I'm smart enough with my finances that I don't foresee any problematic issues coming to a head.

With spring nearing other exciting developments are approaching as well. Spring break will be a much needed breather, St. Patrick's day is always fun, Josh's birthday, Chris's birthday, Aaron's birthday, End of spring semester, beginning of summer session 1, Tom Petty on 4th of july weekend, LOLLAPALOOZA!!!!! (which I'm pretty sure we're going to being that it doesn't interfere with Radiohead), and just summer in general.

Surely with the developments as of late I will soon be out of the stoop that I'm in now.

Life is good. For now.

Slacking with Reason

So I sit.. I wait.. I think.

I have no idea which way is up anymore. I walk over to the window, look outside at the hazed over stars, turn back around, and sit. And wait. And think.

A break? Are you serious? For real?

Some time to prepare, yes, much needed prep time. Prepping my week-long journey of sleepless nights, senseless tossing and turning, and sorrow laden structure. I need a breather.

Withdrawn, misconstrued, and otherwise just plain lost.

My mind is all over the place.

Sitting In Her Nowhere Land

So I guess with the blogging returns the bitching. But with the week I've had, I really think that I deserve it.

The world is not at my command.
Not today anyhow.

I've been without my vehicle, my precious decepticar, for almost a week now. The gas line is frozen and it has not been nearly warm enough to get the beast roaring again.

I'm so broke it's not even funny, and if my car troubles turn out to not be gas line issues then I am going to remain just as broke with car maintenance costs.

My step mom's uncle just died. I feel for her, really. The man was a cool motherfucker, so much pep. However, not to sound insensitive, with the whole family leaving tomorrow for the funeral I have no parental units to rely on for transportation for the duration of the weekend. I can't afford to miss any work. It really seems like every time I have car issues they are out of town.

My aunt is dying. She's in total denial about it, hasn't told anyone... not even her own daughters. With every shell of information that comes up about the issue more tears are shed simply for our lack of the knowledge of the severity and the lack of knowledge that we all have about her condition. We know she has cancer that started in her lungs and has progressed through her entire body... however we have no time frame for her remaining time, we have no information regarding whether or not she will become incapacitated, and the whole thing is a messy, teary wreck. She needs to start making decisions before she loses the ability to.

And on top of it all... the day is Valentine's Day... my least favorite day of the year. Not because I am single because that's far from the truth, but because I think it is the most ridiculous excuse to do something nice for somebody. Do it any other fucking day of the year.

I have a feeling I'm going to need a shoulder really, really soon here.

J With My Foot Up His Ass

My boyfriend sucks.

Go to 'J On Your Face'

Be sure to let him know how awful he is.

Thanks <3

The Return

Since I quit tending to my myspace account, my passion for blogging has long subsided. However, with the discovery of this neat little site my urge has been reignited.

I'm pissed off.

Right now I am working on a persuasive speech about violence in the media (all sorts, not just video games) and it bothers me to think about how many people ignore the facts about studies around this issue.

1) The media we take in is purely choice. If you don't want to watch gun slinging badasses on fox, the turn on the fucking discovery channel.

2) Studies show that violent media stimulates an organ in the brain called the amygdala, an organ in the lymbic system that controls fighting, feeding, fleeing, and fucking. How about we pay attention to the other triggers the amygdala controls other then fighting.

3) Parental units need to stop blaming society's problems on the media and start pointing the finger at themselves.

4) If you don't want your kid getting a hold of violent video games, don't shell out 60 dollars to purchase them Manhunt 2 or Grand Theft Auto. Parents can act as a filter in deciding what's appropriate and what truly isn't.

I hope that my presentation can come off as sharp tongued as this.

Anyway, look for more rants to come. For now, I must away.